"AWAKENING"

Chapter 1

"God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. Therefore will not we fear, though the earth be removed and though the mountains be carried into the midst of the sea."

Psalm 46

Where am I? How did I get here? Who are these people? Why can't I feel anything? Why can't I move? What's wrong with my body? My mind was racing from one thought to the next as I groped for some explanation of the state I was in.

The room was well lighted but there was no glare. It seemed as if the walls themselves and the ceiling were glowing. Five men were standing around me and I could tell that my body was resting on a small table, perhaps an operating table. I had just opened my eyes and I could roll them but had no sensation in any part of my body, as though my mind had been entirely disconnected from it.

One of the men spoke a few words with intense emotion, but I found I could barely hear them. It sounded like he said, "He's reviving...his eyes are open...amazing!" I couldn't tell what the other men were doing, except that they seemed to be working on me somehow. While it was plain that these were men of the medical profession, their manner of dress was different from anything I had seen in a hospital and the room was not like any hospital room I'd ever been in.

They worked over me in silence as I lay there feeling absolutely nothing and barely conscious. No more words were spoken after the first remarks that I heard. How long this activity went on I could not say; but, each moment seemed a century, for my mind was in a state of shocked confusion. It might have been twenty minutes or perhaps an hour before the first trace of feeling began to creep up the back of my neck. It was a dull ache at first which gradually expanded into a splitting headache. This grew into a bursting sensation in the back of my head and then became an unbearable pain moving like hot lava around the upper part of my temples. I would have screamed out in agony; but, I had no sensation of having a throat or lungs and I could do nothing. Tears welled up in my eyes. As the pain increased still further, a red film seemed to darken my vision. I was mercifully relieved from further agony as I lapsed into unconsciousness again.

How much later it was when I awoke again I had no idea; however, I noticed that the surroundings were altogether different. I was now in a room that was elegant and yet unpretentious in its decoration. A girl, perhaps twenty years old, was sitting near the bed so that I saw her as soon as I opened my eyes. She was the very picture of physical health and lovely young womanhood. It was plain that she had been keeping a vigil at my side until my consciousness returned. Her compassion toward me, which I felt as I looked into her eyes, was startling and disarming.

"Who are you?" This time my vocal chords were functioning and the words sounded clearly, if somewhat weakly. The pain was gone from my head and I could feel the rest of my body. For the moment I had forgotten the agony and confusion of the last time I was conscious. I was weak, but I could feel. I could move a little and felt like I was in my body.

"Please be still and don't try to speak now." Her voice was soft and gentle. "You have undergone an experience that brought you near death, but you are through it now. You are weak, very weak; and, you must rest peacefully until you are stronger. Please, don't ask about it now. We will tell you all that we know when you are a little stronger. Please rest quietly."

Her words were soothing and reassuring. I felt that there was nothing to fear. A sense of my extreme weakness began to register when the effort to focus my eyes and move my head almost caused me to faint. If I could not talk or ask questions, perhaps I could think back to events that preceded my present condition. What was the last thing that I could remember? What was I last doing before the sleep or unconsciousness or accident or whatever it was that put me into my present condition? The effort to think seemed to exhaust me and I sank gradually into a state of mental fatigue that must have soon become a deep slumber.

The next time that my consciousness returned, my first awareness came in response to some strange music that was filling the room. The music had a quality that was new to me for it seemed to be going right into my bones. Different parts of my body felt like they were vibrating in resonance with it as the melody and rhythm changed. Now my body felt stronger and my mind was more at peace. As I looked around, I realized that the girl I had seen earlier was no longer with me. Now there was an older man standing near a window on the far side of the room. He smiled slightly as he turned from the window to find me looking at him with what I am sure was a puzzled expression.

"I'm Alex Karoll, Dr. Karoll. You are in my home and it was my daughter, Alice, who was with you when you first regained consciousness three days ago." His voice was reassuring, but it also had a certain ring suggesting inner strength. "You are responding marvelously to our treatment and we expect that you will be on your feet in another five or six days. Please, don't exert yourself mentally or emotionally with questions until we feel that you have the stamina you need."

This man is an unusual person, I thought to myself, for he has the atmosphere of a learned person, but the physique of a fine athlete. Like his daughter, he had a disarming manner and made me feel that I had no cause to be concerned.

In the days that followed I underwent many unfamiliar treatments to nourish and strengthen me physically and to keep me undisturbed emotionally. It was two or three days after my second awakening in the doctor's home before I was given any kind of food. During that time my body was massaged several times each day with various delightful smelling liquids. Some of these were oily and some seemed to be soaked up by my skin like water is taken up by chamois. After each of these massages I had a pleasant sense of having been nourished and strengthened. At times, more of the unusual music was used to cause my body and mind to relax. At other times a panel in the ceiling glowed brilliantly with gradually changing fluorescent colors which had a soothing effect and gave me a sense of physical and mental wellbeing.

Fresh fruit juices were my first food, then in a few days, delicious purees from fresh raw fruits, nuts and sprouted grains were added. Each of these were given at separate times and I was cautioned to take them slowly. Gradually, I began to feel like a normally functioning human being. By the time that I was up and around I had been treated with special rays, colored lights, sound, with electrical therapy using discs and wires applied to various parts of my body, massage, osteopathic manipulations, oils and solutions which were rubbed into my skin, incenses, hydrotherapy, sun baths and herbal tonics. The hypodermic needles, pills, and other internal medicines I was familiar with were conspicuously absent.

During my first weakness and confusion I took all the attention given me for granted, but as strength returned to my body, I became more and more conscious of the efforts being spent in my behalf. I began to be overwhelmed by the gentleness and kindness being expressed toward me by everyone. Though a stranger to them all, this family was showering me with loving kindness equal to the care my mother gave to me when I was a small child.

The day soon came when the good doctor said that I was strong enough to ask the questions which he knew were crowding my mind. He suggested that I have dinner with his family and afterwards we would talk. The evening meal was to mark my first association with Dr. Karoll and his family as a social experience. As with all my other needs, the doctor had provided me with appropriate clothing. While I had never been especially concerned with clothing styles, I could not fail to notice many differences in the attire furnished me. The evening was expected to be an unusual occasion by all and I could feel the excitement in the air.

Several days previously I had been introduced to the doctor's wife as she helped attend my needs. I was impressed that she was a perfect counterpart in womanhood to match the caliber of the man. It all seemed too perfect and ideal to be a reality. Like Dr. Karoll, she had poise and vigorous physical health and, in addition, a feminine beauty that was both youthful and queenly. Their daughter, Alice, who was twenty-five, and their sixteen year old son, James, were both with them for the evening. James was home from school just for the occasion.

The dinner was simple in its preparation, a variety of tasty raw and lightly cooked vegetable sprouts and nuts with a dessert of stewed wild cherries. Mrs. Karoll served an appetizing hot drink about twenty minutes before dinner to prepare our digestive systems, just as one might use a light wine. The doctor asked a blessing movingly from his heart, setting an atmosphere of reverence and humility. The meal itself was partaken of as if it were an act of worship. I found myself carefully watching the manners of those around me to imitate them, for my usual way of eating, acceptable as it was at any formal gathering, would have seemed uncouth in their presence. I particularly noticed that no one partook of nearly the quantity of food that I would have called normal and there was no conversation during the meal. Lovely classical music, some that I recognized, some that I had never heard, accompanied the meal loud enough to listen to but softly.

After this, we all gathered in their spacious family room around the fireplace. The smell of burning cedar was in the air and the pleasant surroundings were relaxing. However, the prospect of learning something of how I arrived in my present situation naturally excited me.